There is Never Enough Time

clock2

Having just spent a week with my father, I realize there will never be enough time.

I got a scary call that my father was rushed to the ER last Saturday night. I was at work and being in another state not only made me feel scared sh*tless but helpless.

This had been my biggest fear that one day this could happen. And it was here.

Could I handle it?!?

My dad is in his 70s and had never been in the hospital before.

Once I learned there was a medical issue and he was being admitted into the hospital, I rushed out of work, with minimal clothing and only my personal items on my back, to catch the last flight out for the night.

Freaking out was an understatement.

Was this it? Was this the beginning of the end of our time together?

Once arriving, I then rented a car and drove 2.5 hours to the hospital. It was hell driving. Thoughts going through my mind in every direction.

I made it and remained bedside for days until he was discharged from the hospital.

I barely ate for days thinking I would throw up at every bite. Never experiencing trying to sleep in the hospital before, it was the most frustrating thing. Every time we dozed off, the nurses came in. Sleeping in a chair (even with it reclining and a blanket) was interesting.

Sleep deprived, scared, and nutrition starved is quite a combination.

We as humans can sustain a lot of stress I realize.

And somehow we made it through.

This past week has been a total life transformation for my dad. I spent hours researching medical stuff and a healthy diet and introducing it all to him.

I hope his new lifestyle and going out for walks will prolong his life.

But this week taught me, we just never know.

When it is our time, it is our time.

I know there will never be enough time.

We must just be at peace with this in our lives and make the most of every day.

I have always been one to share my feelings and tell those special to me how I feel. I may just be doing it a tad bit more now.

Sorry if it annoys you.

We have our family and friends and our dreams. We have the special moments in our lives that make us smile and the times that make us wish we could stop time.

Since we cannot stop time, there will never be enough time.

We must focus on the little moments in our lives. Complain less and be more present.

little thingsThe little things in life are the biggest to me.

The capturing an amazing sunset or laughing uncontrollably at work or singing in the car or sharing texts with my favorite people in my life.

The crawling into bed and feeling totally at peace or the ability to clear my mind to read a book.

The lyrics and melodies to the country music I am addicted to or the hot baths that feel so good.

The lunches and dinners shared with family and friends or the high after a good workout.

Since life is so busy and work has us pulled away from the things we would rather be doing, we must pick up every little simple thing that is a part of our daily living. We must notice those things more.

I have always known life is short, but living in the moment is the most important thing we can do.

So be present and live life up no matter what we are doing.

If we are not present, there is not enough time.

There will never be enough time.

But maybe, just maybe, if we do it right, we can feel it to be almost enough.

present

2 thoughts on “There is Never Enough Time

  1. 5 minutes. That’s all I had with my Father during the week that we knew there was a serious problem. I too, found out at work. Drove a couple hours, and watched an incoherent man twitch in pain even with enough drugs that he was unaware of it. The docs finally figured out the right combo of drugs and he rested comfortably.

    Two days later, he awoke, for 5 minutes. I had just enough time to tell him thank you and that I loved him. I left the hospital knowing that was the last time I’d see him. Couple days later, again while at work, he died.

    The one regret in life I have is not spending more time with him. Or even just talking on the phone more. It really is my only regret. That not bad for a whole life. But it’s a huge one. And eats at me constantly.

    You’re right. We never have enough time. I know exactly how you felt during your trip down there. I’m sorry you went through that. We all do, but it still sucks. In a sense, you been given a gift. More time. Use it wisely.

  2. This was definitely a very hard week for you for sure (especially the beginning ). Although that is a very common thing to say it’s good you are realizing it now as opposed to later. We all have busy lives & need to slow down sometimes to be able to figure these things out.
    We need to make time for those who are important to us & cherish the time we do.
    Timing on these things is never good & we can’t predict when it will happen, but to know you did everything you could is important.
    I know your Dad appreciates all you have done for him & your friends do too!
    Keep on doin what your doing!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s